Journal

1. Transparency

January 24, 2018

Dear Journal,

You know me better than I know myself. You are a reflection of what I represent and a mirror where I look at when I get lost and I want to find myself. You are the cure of my anxiety and the only thing that helps me to relieve my feelings. Writing means so much to me! I surrender to another world and I become submissive so I can taste the pleasure of freedom.

I learned to express myself through writing. I don’t like to talk about my feelings with someone. I don’t know if you believe me but, sometimes I just can’t find the words to make up a stupid sentence. Maybe because I’m too weak or maybe because I’m afraid to.

People call me weird since ever. At first, I felt offended  and I said to myself that I have a problem. I cried. Words can kill you inside sometimes. I thought that I’m the only one that was called like that. Yeah… Well,  I was just a kid! Kids are sooo silly! (smiling) After a while I got used to it. No tears, no pain, just a facial expression.

We take things too personal and we like to play the victim. I was doing this, till one day when I met a person and I called him weird.  That was the day when I realized that we are all a little weird, that we all have our own issues. I understood that this is what makes us different. Yes, we all have the same hand gestures, we make the same mistakes, we have the same activities but, there’s something special in each one of us that gives us this weirdness. The older you get, the more you appreciate yourself. Life humbles you so deeply as you age! You accept yourself the way you are, you love meaningful things and you realize how much time you have wasted on nonsense.

Journal is about me, is about essence, is about feelings.

Special thanks to Old City Apartment Oradea for the beautiful location.

Endless love,

 

 

 

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